CHAINS
Dear Freckles and Readers,
Last evening I slept before writing anything
now my body aches...
its been a while I have not done any long walk
as much as yesterday...
I guess this is the way my body is saying
man you need to move more..
let's see what kind of a day awaits us...
the weather looks ok now as of 6 am
still yawning here as I write these words to you
my brain is running in the idle mode
asking coffee from me..
a pitch tar black bitter juice
I drink 2 large cups of that piss every morning
its made with 4 spoonful of dark roast coffee
it wakes me up
I need coffee...
now I am writing to you from the sill of the realms of sleep and wake...
in transition stage
have not seen any dreams lately probably I have been sleeping uneasy and fall in to sleep
rather than put my head on the pillow to sleep...
maybe I see the dreams but I don't remember them as I woke up...
I wonder what kind of dreams you see when you are completely awaken?
the personas, filters, characters, prejudices...
you are beautiful the way you are!
you don't need filters, personas, characters, prejudices...
they are not yours to begin with.
they are the traits of common perceptions society dictates upon you....
our primal brains have social aspect to it
if you want to be in the herd you need to do all the unacceptable things the herd is doing
herd tries to mold you into something that you are not
enlightenment comes with the understanding of this knowledge of "real"
awakening on the other hand comes with complete immersion in that knowledge
and slowly cutting the chains of these "concepts" binding your soul
when you cut all the chains one by one
you are going to be left with who you truly are
and believe me
you will find terrible things there as well
its painful
but you come into understanding with yourself
the great confrontation
this freeing of self has layers like an onion.
like the layers of society as units
family, friends and small social groups, affiliation to school, job etc., than to your town, country, being a humankind as a species...
because all these bind your mind and soul with different chains..
as you remove these chains of personas, filters, prejudices which were developed in your life journey
unwillingly and without you realizing...
you will become free.
these things you want to break the chains with roots so deep that
even if you break the bond with them
you might not be free from them right away..
the parts that rooted in you can pops up all of a sudden
and makes you think "oh I thought I have dealt with this!"
even you move forward in the process
you will come again and again to the same old fears, thought patterns, prejudices, personas, filters...
the difference now is that you will be aware of them and have the knowledge to deal with them
because you already made a great work by cutting the chain that binds you to those...
So un-awakened reader...
I know you care greatly on how others perceive you...
let go of it...
focus on how you perceive yourself...
focus on loving yourself first
(you are not stupid, neither silly, let go of the over-self criticism, I know its easier said than done! because I know it from the fact that I am battling the same things my self...but I also see that it gets easier and better as you go along!)
because if you cannot love yourself and accept yourself as the way you are
you cannot accept and truly love other broken, imperfect persons such as yourself.
kisses from me to your stupid face as a honest human being, (Meow, rubbing my cat head to your legs purring!)
giving a loving hand to help you with your own battles.
don't give up the good fight!
knowing, accepting and loving yourself as the way you are is the greatest battle you will give in this process!
I really need some coffee
I hope I wrote you something decent...
in this half sleep state!
hope to write you when
awakened as well
Bye.
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